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  • From all you've told us, Laa? Your mom would have been an awesome CEO!

    I am never bored, love hobbies and self-improvement classes and HATE boring, unfulfilling work! As much as I like my current employer? The work bores me and I've already been ramping up the hobbies, crafts, reading for pleasure etc.
    Itís just really honestly so tiring and emotionally draining to have to get upset over reality constantly.

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    • I did pretty well in an office culture. Never had any super close friendships, but I got along with everyone. I once took a personality test at work, where they categorized me as an 'amiable misfit' and everyone in my department was like, "Ohhhh, yeah that's it exactly." I could sit at any lunch table at the office cafeteria and it would be fine, but I didn't have any besties.

      I think most folks thought I was fun to be around, but just a little bit weird.



      As a boss, I was the 'nice one' . . often paired with 'the less nice one'. Like they would bring me into a department to help manage a team that was moaning and groaning about how strict and scary the exec over them was, and I would be the buffer person. I usually focused more on developing the careers of the folks I managed than any other priority. I could generally rely on anyone there to do their jobs well, so professional development and group morale was my thing. It's probably a good thing nobody expected me to be very dragon-lady-ish, because I would have failed so majorly at that! But I got to be everybody's den mother instead, and that suited me better. I had a very high promotion and raise rate in my departments -- amazing how you can turn someone's whole career around just by teaching them better interpersonal skills. Like how to write a friendly email. Emoticons are your friends, people! Or which sales people like to have their shoes complimented or which ones want to talk basketball with you before you just jump into telling them that their clients are stupid and want stupid things.

      And I started out with this crazy work ethic (I worked four christmases and new year's in a row, almost never took vacas, was in the office from 9 'til 7, etc.) and then I realized I was setting a terrible example for the folks that worked under me. So I eased back and tried to get everyone else to do the same. It's tough in NY, though, to walk out the door at 5:30. You definitely get side-eyed by everyone -- "what are we working banker's hours, now?" And that perception will affect your reviews, your bonuses, etc., so you get pressured to be one of the last in the office regardless. I had no real life/work balance when I had an office job. Left my apt in the dark, came home in the dark. Ate my dinners and breakfasts on the train or at the train station. Almost never took a true sick day. I would stay home when sick, but I'd still be on calls and online all day long. And just living and commuting in NYC is hell on somebody as introverted as I am. And traveling! There were stretches in my career where I was flying JFK - San Jose twice a month. Or to Boston, to Chicago, to Arizona, to Nevada, to France. ANNOYING. Okay, France was nice. (They sent me to Nice -- ha!)

      So even though I feel like I was fairly competent at the whole corporate thing, I do not miss any of it and would not choose to do it again. No amount of personal mentoring from Sheryl could have gotten me to stay, so a book definitely would not have. Even though my departure coincided with becoming a mom, it was far from the only factor.

      But! I still think what she has done is perfectly valid for people whose overall life philosophy and goals are different from mine.

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      • I'm in work hell. Last year, before BabyNeo made her debut, I changed jobs. My last job had autonomy and I was basically in a stand-alone position with some authority.

        Now I'm in a position where doctors/surgeons think they're God. And I fucking hate that. I like the job itself but not dealing with these dillholes. Or one, specifically, who hypothetically suffers from Small Man Syndrome. A lot of them are also from cultures that don't have a lot of respect for women in the workplace either.

        Small Man is trying to get me fired. Of course, he's always trying to get one of use fired, but right now I'm his target. He bitched me out a few weeks ago for something someone else did- I just happened to be the first "underling" he saw so I got the abuse. I stood there and took it (which made me pissed off at myself) but then I went and had him written up. Fuck that noise! I guess he didn't like that much...

        Plus he bitched me out in front of three other people so everyone knows about it. He brought in a cake the other day (ha!) and someone asked him if that was his version of a peace offering.

        So last week, I had to interact with him again, thankfully with witnesses. I was polite and answered his questions accordingly and muthafuckin PROFESSIONAL.

        I get called in an hour later because he called the big boss and said I was very rude to him. He screamed at me and basically called me incompetent in front of witnesses but MY behavior was rude? I'd laugh if he wasn't such an asshole. Luckily my direct supervisor was one of my witnesses who verified I didn't do anything wrong.

        I'd like to kick this fucker in his tiny man nads.
        "But my greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live.Ē---Kanye

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        • Ugh! That sounds awful! I couldn't handle it. I grew up too close to ghetto! Because that is grounds for grabbing him by the throat and telling him to fuck himself. I'm cray, tho.
          Itís just really honestly so tiring and emotionally draining to have to get upset over reality constantly.

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          • He bitched you out AGAIN? AFTER he brought the lame cake? What the fuck is his deal! This last time had witnesses, so maybe he'll stay in line. Otherwise, yep, kick those nads.

            My very first boss was also from a culture that doesn't have a lot of respect for women in the workplace! That never occurred to me at the time, but it explains so much. I was a receptionist/biller for a doctor's office, and my boss (not the doctor) was a corrupt, powertripping idiot who insisted people call him Dr. too (he has a PHD in Beek knows what). Anyway, I quit after three months because he was so bizarrely critical, patronizing, and angry all the time, with the nurses (which is why we had new nurses every two weeks or so) and especially with me. Like, this dude insisted my penmanship should look more like his, and he seriously picked up a pen and wrote the alphabet on a post-it so I could refer to it.

            o, corporate good cop sounds (minus the hours) sounds dreamy.

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            • I'd like to kick this fucker in his tiny man nads.
              Ugh. I don't think I could ever work with doctors. So many props to you that you manage to do so.

              Like, this dude insisted my penmanship should look more like his, and he seriously picked up a pen and wrote the alphabet on a post-it so I could refer to it.
              THAT IS CRAY. No, seriously. INSANE.

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              • Yeah, I can barely tolerate average office bullshit let alone spectacular stuff. I wouldn't last 10 minutes with a post-it note freakshow.
                Itís just really honestly so tiring and emotionally draining to have to get upset over reality constantly.

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                • Heh, getting yelled at by doctors was basically in my job description! The old docs were cool, but occasionally, we'd get an uppity fellow who thought he owned the hospital and he'd yell at us for errything. But only when he wasn't otherwise occupied by being condescending, 'cause that took up a good deal of time, too. Oh, and of course these guys were always suuuuper nice when they were hitting on you. Over time, you just learn to dissociate, usually once you realize it has nothing to do with you. You were just the punching bag at the gym.

                  My boss now is like a dream. After about a month in, he realized he could trust me and now he leaves me the fuck alone and I don't have to deal with anybody's shit! Well, except the patients', but then there's always gonna be that, both literal and figurative.

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                  • Yeah that was the bosses verdict too, just give it time and he'll eventually trust you with his patients. But until then I have to worry that he'll report me just because his tiny nads itch that day? It was just retaliation for reporting him and it's against the law.

                    I was bored to tears at my last job but I had a private office (where I could nap) and I didn't have to deal with this crap. I just want to shake his tiny ass and start listing off all my degrees in his tiny fucker face even if it makes me seem tacky to do so.
                    Last edited by NeoMaxy; 03-12-2013, 03:22 PM.
                    "But my greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live.Ē---Kanye

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                    • Home from work by 4 for the 3rd day this week! WHEEEEEEEEE! And I'm alone in the house which never ever happens anymore!!!1 Double WHEEEEEEE! And it doesn't even end there! I got a "discretionary spending" allowance today! The last time I had that, I was 22 and dumb and hated my job. I don't even know what to spend it on. It's supposed to be for my supplies or the occasional lunch for the office team, but they just gave me brand new everything when I started so I don't really need anything. I feel like DK's orange Prada is a work essential. I mean, happier Issie=more productive Issie=better patient care, amirite?

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                      • Yes!

                        My boss took me out to lunch today to tell me she wants me to eventually supervise the web guy/team. And she will pay for whatever training I want. I love her!
                        Itís just really honestly so tiring and emotionally draining to have to get upset over reality constantly.

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                        • AWESOME!!



                          That sounds like a lot of fun actually.

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                          • Yeah, I just paid 75k in federal tax, 40k in sales tax, found out current employee(s) is stealing from inventory (we don't know which one), got in a fight about cameras at work (they aren't working right), found out we are getting HEADSETS (hate), had mental tantrum and came home to broken plumbing.

                            Y'all are like fantasy television people to me right now without real problems.

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                            • Boo, dude. Can you at least accidentally break your headset?

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                              • I have not done my taxes yet. It's gonna be a horror show.
                                Itís just really honestly so tiring and emotionally draining to have to get upset over reality constantly.

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