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Hypochondria as a legitimate hobby

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  • thanks guys - - first world problems and all that. But it is good to be able to vent.

    Saw my oncologist yesterday - she went over my scan results. With the first scan (before chemo) there was a "spot" on my right lung and liver. The spot on the lung is gone, the one on the liver is benign. Taxol will be reduced by 10% since the 1st one was so bad and the 2nd on was a bit of a pain. Now they tell me about ice slippers/mittens! I read about that on a cancer forum but forgot to bring it up at the 2nd session. I really should write stuff down.
    Two more chemo sessions to go. Then I have to start on hormone pills. The surgeon should be calling soon to discuss when the surgery will happen. So then the radiation can be scheduled.

    I've been trying to decide about the surgery. When I met him in March it was just a basic: we're going to do a mastectomy, reconstruction about a year later. Which was pretty much what I'd read in forums. At the time I guess I was just "OK, you're the doctor, you've done this before, whatever you think best." Now I'm wondering if I should get a double mastectomy - because the cancer might come back in a few years (so let's cut down on the chances of that, ya know?). And I'm wondering if I should even bother with reconstruction. I always been a bit dubious about implants - - foreign chemicals and all that. A while back NBC had a story on textured implants causing cancer. So yeah - - good times.

    But! A free weekend before chemo. B-ball viewing with friends tonight. Family stuff tomorrow. And hockey. The weather is finally nice so I'll be out at one of the parks too.

    And!!!! I'm below 175 lbs. I've lost just over 75 lbs from my highest weight! Most of it was from before cancer - mostly due to stress, the ex, money issues, etc. I was at 190 for about 2 years, then got sick in March (before chemo started) and lost 10 lbs. So really only lost 5 lbs due to cancer. But I'm feeling good.


    • Oh, the reconstruction issues is so complex! I tend to think I'd go double without reconstruction if it was me, but maaaaan . . .

      I really love my boobs like a lot.

      Do you watch Jane The Virgin? Jane's mom has been dealing with breast cancer this past season and she goes through alllll the emotions when it comes to mastectomy decisions. They had several scenes at her chemo sessions, showing her wearing an ice cap to keep from losing her hair, and showing how agonizingly slow her recovery has been, etc. They even let the actress look like someone dealing with a major health crisis, and they let the character show just how angry/exhausted/fed up/scared she is about it all. They've handled that story arc with a lot of sensitivity and realism(?) from what I can see so far.

      My mom, on the other hand, continues to have a very disappointingly Un TV-like Cancer Experience. After two biopsies and three months since diagnosis, she still didn't know what kind of cancer she has, and her oncologist doesn't do the kind of cancer they THINK she's got, so she had to find a new one -- but! literally all the cancer centers in the area were like, "A new medicare patient? LOL NOPE". So she went a couple of weeks with no cancer doctor at all and no hope for one on the horizon until she started getting dizzy a lot and decided to check into a hospital and refuse to leave until they assigned her an oncologist and got her a third biopsy. Which sort of worked? She's been in the hospital all this week and FINALLY has an actual cancer team. They STILL don't know what exact kind of Non Hodgkin Lymphoma it is (or if it for sure is that) and no new biopsy yet, but at least now she's got actual non-Keystone Kop-like professionals to talk to, which is progress. She's getting the vibe from the new docs that her prognosis is still Really Bad, though. I mean at this point we are all reconciled to this being the thing that kills her, the main question is just will chemo buy her a couple of years or not. (best guess right now is that it won't.)


      • UGH!

        OPHY I AM SO BESIDE MYSELF WITH FRUSTATION AT YOUR MOM'S MEDICAL CARE. But also this is America and it's not even shocking. It's just infuriating!

        Res? You're such a sweet badass! <3.
        Itís just really honestly so tiring and emotionally draining to have to get upset over reality constantly.


        • My mom's third biopsy was . . . INCONCLUSIVE once again. So at least they are being consistent, I suppose! They no longer think it's Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma, though, so her new oncologist is going to shove her back to her old oncologist and that week she spent in the hospital was pointless because now she needs a fourth biopsy. But as you know, the old popular saying is Fourth times the charm, oh wait . . .

          I've been trying to distract myself with TSwizzle shenanigans because all I do is worry but it ain't working.


          • I am with Is in being enraged on behalf of the whole family. I know our healthcare is totally broken, but how could we be this far in and they STILL donít know what cancer it is? Ugh. I am so sorry you all have to deal with this.


            • Ok. This is just unbelievable. You should just sue everybody.